Recorded in the beautiful home office, Chateau/ Relaxo, FL.
If you’re a first-time listener, welcome. If you're a returning listener welcome back.
Tonight's show notes were written while enjoying Lagunitas IPA coming in at 6.2% ABV but since I’m recording this on Sunday morning and I’m not that much of a monster I’m partaking in a cool crisp Diet Coke 0.0% ABV.
Let’s open with some international stories as crazy travel isn’t always domestic.
With all the years of traveling on planes one thing that has never struck a chord with me was wanting to actually pilot or fly a plane. I have no desire, I lack that sort of detail, I like to fiddle with things and all the instruments in a cockpit would be a field day for me, but also certain death for myself and any passengers.
From BoingBoing - Dateline Lancashire, England
During a particularly windy day, the pilot of a four-person prop plane requested that a flying instructor join him in the air just to be on the safe side. Great attention to detail.
Shortly after take-off, the instructor's head tilted back and he closed his eyes. The pilot thought the instructor was "just pretending to take a nap" during the short flight. Ahh, the prankster flight instructor.
The flight instructor wasn’t "just pretending to take a nap" he was dead, due to cardiac arrest. Thoughts to the flight instructor's family, but you have to feel for the actual pilot because unless he walks on the moon he will always be remembered for this one incident. And I wonder if he’s required to let everyone else in the cockpit know that “Yes, I’m that guy”
Next up some parenting news. I’m a parent, and when I first became a parent I never received an official parenting manual so like most had to figure stuff out. 30+ years later all the kids are still alive. This next story isn’t a “Parenting Hack” it’s closer to the 1990 movie Home Alone.
From CNN Dateline Brussels
A couple flying to Brussels from Tel Aviv checked into their flight, but realized their infant did not have a ticket (2 tickets 3 humans) — This couple had neglected to pay the 25 euro fee for lap babies flying without a paid seat. Adding to the predicament, the couple was running late. So what did they do? Glad you asked, the couple just left the baby in its car seat at the airport's check-in desk and then sprinted off, making sure to catch their flight.
Situations like this make me wonder how did both of them decide this was the appropriate thing to do? Usually, if one parent has a stupid idea the other one keeps them in check…. Not in this case.
What’s even crazier, get this, once airport security tracked the couple down, they were reconnected with their child there was "no further" investigation.
Possibly they abandoned the baby so they could go to the Doody-Free shop.
Time for our first “Thank You Florida” story - Man arrested after making a bomb threat at Orlando International Airport.
A man was arrested on February 2nd after he allegedly made a bomb threat at Orlando International Airport. The reason… he was frustrated over airline baggage prices.
Danny Curry and his wife were set to board a Spirit Airlines flight from Orlando to Pensacola when Curry became frustrated over the airline's carry-on baggage fees.
Apparently, Curry wasn’t aware that Spirit charges for everything.
coffee ($2),
sodas and juices ($3),
beer and wine ($8)
snacks like Pringles or Oreos (starting at $3).
If you want to fly with your pet in the cabin Spirit charges $110 per pet container… each way.
They charge you for the seat you select, anywhere from $12 to $40
When it comes to luggage the fee for a carry-on varies as to when you pay for it.
When bags are paid for?
Carry-on bag
During Spirit.com booking - $35.
After booking, but before checking in online - $45.
During online check-in - $45.
At the airport (before the gate) - $55.
At the gate - $65.
And this is how a $50 ticket on a discount airline ends up costing you as much as flying one of the majors.
Back to curry - his frustration got to the point that according to the arrest affidavit, Curry said "I bet you, everyone on that aircraft is going to deplane, there is a bomb on that aircraft," to an airline employee.
Of course FBI, TSA, police, and K-9 units performed a sweep of the plane and all luggage, and guess what, no bomb was found.
According to the affidavit, Curry claimed to detectives that he actually said, "What IF there was a bomb in that plane," Regardless he was promptly arrested, and now faces a charge of a false bomb report.
We all know the Florida motto - Florida come on vacation, leave on probation.
Time for our second “Thank you Florida” story. And this one starts with a question. If you check a bag what’s the quickest way to baggage claim?
Stairs? No
Elevator? No
Escalator? No
Give up?
It’s falling through the drop ceiling and onto the baggage claim belt. Before you try to figure out how a passenger pulled this off it wasn’t a passenger it was a worker that apparently made a wrong move and discovered that gravity isn’t just a good idea, it’s the law.
Let’s set the stage for this next story.
There are a lot of people that are freaked out or as the CEO says “Skeived out” by fingernail clipping or fingernail clippings. I for one am not one of those people, nor do I have a fingernail fetish
If you are “Skeived out” by the aforementioned while stuck on a plane this could be debilitation.
From View From the Wing we have - Passenger Clips Their Nails On A Flight, Flicks One Onto The Person Beside Them.
There’s a Ticky-Tock video of the incident in the post with the caption - “POV: when the passenger next to you decides to clip their nails and one lands on you and now you have to ask yourself if going on the no-fly list is all that bad”
The author Gary Leff asks “What would you do? “ and of course, the comments were filled with keyboard lawyers arguing the legality of wresting nail clippers away from someone on an airplane some even going so far as to quote legal code. For me, I would clandestinely pick up the nail fragment and then wait till beverage service when I would drop the nail in their beverage and say, “you lost this”.
We’ve talked about this before - Would you be willing to give your seat up so that a family with a child could fly together? If I recall my answer really depends on the situation, and factors such as the length of the flight. Is the seat I’m moving to in front of where my carry-on is stored and who is asking. If a flight attendant is asking I will usually comply, because oftentimes this means free adult beverages.
Dateline Salvador, Brazil - CATFIGHT OVER WINDOW SEAT LEADS TO MASSIVE BRAWL, WITH 15 PEOPLE THROWN OFF FLIGHT.
As I said dateline is Brazil, not “Thank You Florida”
A mother with a special needs child boarded and wanted to sit in the window seat.
A woman already seated in the window seat denied the request.
The mother (or perhaps the sister according to one source) of the special needs child took “offense” at the way in which the request was denied and attacked the woman in the window seat.
And that’s when all hell broke loose and it was 10 against five with one of the women losing her top mid-battle.
There’s a video, there’s always a video and in case there are two videos.
Suddenly there were fifteen open seats because everyone involved was thrown off the plane.
Live and Let’s Fly summed up the post with this “You are free to ask someone (politely is recommended) to swap seats, but if that person says no then you really have no right to be angry” I have to agree.
That last story had a woman that lost her top how about another topless passenger story?
Again from Live and Let’s Fly -
This took place on an Aeroflot flight from Stavropol (STW) to Moscow (SVO). During turbulence, despite the seatbelt light being illuminated, 49-year-old Anzhelika Moskvitina, I’ll call her Anz. Anz left her seat and headed to the lavatory. There, Anz fired up a cigarette, quickly followed by a flight attendant knocking on the door and scolding her for smoking.
Believe it or not, Anz wasn’t in trouble…yet.
Inside of heading back to her seat and Anz decided to take up her smoking ban with the pilots and tried to enter the cockpit. In case you were wondering you can’t smoke on Russian planes or freely enter a Russian cockpit
When the pilots didn’t respond Anz stripped off her top and attacked flight attendants, biting one of them on the shoulder. The bite drew blood and prompted treatment upon landing at Moscow Sheremetyevo Airport.
With the help of business class passengers, a top was placed back on her, followed by Anz being restrained and zip-tied. Anz now faces criminal penalties and is awaiting deployment to the Western Front.
I’ve never understood how someone can get so mad that taking their clothes off is the next best step.
Like I always say airplane and airport nudity is never good nudity.
In 2019 I bought a standup desk and in true Chateau’ Relaxo form I gave my leather Lazy-Boy leather desk chair to the CEO and haven’t looked back or sat down since.
Friend of the show Robbie Morris says that sitting is the new smoking.I don’t think I could make it through the day sitting not standing behind a desk.
View From the Wing posted this - Delta Air Lines Passenger Uses His Coach Seat As A Standing Desk, And I’m Here For It
Author Gary Leff started the post with this - “A Delta Air Lines economy passenger was spotted inflight on a four-hour flight using his seat as a standing desk. He’s resting his laptop on top of his seat back and facing backward to work. This is a power move.”
downbad whose @ is NYDouche_capital took the picture and posted it to Twitter
And Twitter didn’t disappoint with comments like this.
If you have an Apple computer for work I promise you the work can wait.
Wow, brand new incredibly insufferable guy just dropped.
A single word - Chad
Must be working at a startup
My favorite - He’s that important but won’t fly business?
My take and let me preface it with this. Most of my flights are less than 2 hours coupled with I haven’t been on a plane in the last 6 months.
I rarely do business work on planes. I might review a presentation or check emails…. But I’m not crushing a spreadsheet or sending out meeting invites…. And I’m certainly not going to stand up and place my laptop on the top of my seat and work facing the back of the plane.
So I agree with Gary - This is a power move.
Finishing up with this.
I am the last person to dispense relationship advice, but when it comes to this next story I’m thinking the gentleman could have handled this a bit differently.
Live And Let’s Fly for the hat trick Man Dumps Girlfriend On American Airlines Flight, Leading To Meltdown and Removal
This took place pre-COVID, which really doesn’t mean or change anything.
There’s a video, what do we say? All together now - There’s always a video.
If you've ever watched or listened to Ron White he has a bit about flying on a plane that suddenly needs to make an emergency landing due to loss in oil pressure and Ron delivers this line - “The guy next to me is *losing his mind* well that’s exactly what this you lady does in the video.
She’s on all fours in the aisle of the plane dropping F-Bombs while she’s simultaneously screaming and crying, a true multitasker.
After watching this here’s my advice - If you want to break up in public, do it at a Chili’s or Applebees' because there are multiple exits.
Three years later, I wonder if she’s still crying.
There you have it episode 185, The February crazy travel roundup.
If you want detailed show notes, links, and pictures head over to podpage.com/travel-stories/
Or visit Substack at travelstories.substack.com/
You can also leave me a message on Anchor, or shoot me an email at TravelFrick@gmail.com.
As I always say, travel safe, stay safe, and thanks for listening.
The February Crazy Travel Roundup - Travel Stories, Episode 185